Friday, April 23, 2010

The Adventures of Emma and Jody

My friend Emma, A.K.A. "M" and me have certainly had our moments of fun and laughter and everything in between. We have traveled down many avenues in our little town, but even the simple life has its share of ups and downs. If one of us is feeling down, it doesn't last for long, because just around the corner there is another adventure about to unfold. Let me take a moment to share some of our treasures with you.

Yard Sales - If there is one thing M and I love to do, it is going to yard sales. One of our favorites is the annual sale at the local civic center. On one such visit, we began browsing down the aisles and each of us had collected an armload of goodies. I saw a huge oriental fan displayed on one of the tables. I thought to myself that if someone had Asian decor in their home, it would be a nice piece to have. After I touched the fan it fell down and I put it back in its place. M said, "The fan fell down behind the table again, Jody." I went back to the table several times and every time I left, it would fall down again. I think it was jinxed.

We came to a table that had the most adorable kitty figurines and we both remarked that KC, A.K.A crazy cat lady would just love them. No sooner had the words come out of our mouths than, as if by magic, KC appeared in the doorway and headed straight for the feline display. I don't remember who giggled first, but it was contagious. Then, M said, "Look Jody, the pope is watching us." I'm thinking to myself, the pope is here? M said to look up on the wall and, sure enough, there was a portrait of Pope Benedict all adorned in white. It seemed that wherever we went, the pope's eyes were following us. For some reason this made us feel guilty. I guess he thought we were being irreverent. By this time we were laughing hysterically and one of the yard sale attendants gave us a dirty look. I could tell she was a humorless old soul.

Then, there was the matter of the cradle. I looked across the room and saw a super-sized cradle with a stand. It was just what I needed for my old baby dolls and stuffed animals. I hurried and grabbed the cradle before anyone else could get to it. I didn't want to call Mr. Man, my husband, for help transporting it. M said since we were within walking distance of my house that she would help me carry it. She took one end of the frame that the cradle was hooked to and I took the other end. As we began to walk, the cradle started swinging higher and higher and we decided that we needed to stop and unhook it from the frame. During this process the cradle hit the ground and the giggles started again. M made a comment that it must be a "blonde" thing. M wanted to carry the cradle, but I told her it was too heavy and that I should carry it since she was helping me out. We finally came to an agreement and I convinced her to carry the frame instead. All this, because I was too stubborn to ask Mr. Man for help.

There were also some plants and flowers for sale and, of course, we like our gardens to look pretty. However, we are such bargain hunters that we decided we should wait and come back closer to the end of the sale. Everyone is tired and just wants to get rid of the left overs. We came back with my little red wagon and everything we wanted was half price. I guess you could say we are a little cheap or you could say we know how to get the most bang for the buck!

Exercise - M is an avid bicyclist and walker and, in the past, I have tried to share in these activities with her. I kind of think of her as a female Lance Armstrong. My idea is to perform these exercises for my enjoyment as well as the physical benefits. I like to take my time, stop and chat along the way, etc. M is a little more driven than me and on more than one occasion, when we have been together, she has disappeared on her bicycle. When I can't find her I just end up going home. However, one early summer morning I was on my bicycle and she was on foot. We had devised a plan to try to catch someone who she thought was following her. We started down the sidewalk with me on my bike, a little ahead of her. I had my cell phone in my pocket. She had her camera with her and we proceeded with the plan. If the person showed up she would take a picture of the perpetrator and I was to call the P.D. As it turned out the person was a no show. We figured they must have had a bad "vibe" that day. No doubt, it was because M and Jody were on the case!

Kitchen Duty - M and I share recipe secrets and swap leftovers and we both love to bake for family and friends. Her bread is the best and everyone around here is delighted if she has an extra loaf to share. One Christmas we decided to get together in my kitchen. We baked an assortment of cookies and made candy. The only problem was that after we had created our masterpieces, it was time to celebrate. Each and every treat had to be sampled and topped off with a tall glass of milk. Our willpower took a vacation and I don’t know why we thought we could get away with it!

Monday, April 19, 2010

Rainy Sunday

I used to have a decorative "Holly Hobby" plate that hung on the wall in my kitchen. It had a quote on it that said, "Count the Sunny Hours and Forget the Rainy Days." I dropped it on the floor one day and, of course, it broke in a million pieces. For some reason I never forgot that phrase and almost every time it rains, I think of it.

One such "rainy day" occurred in early spring on a Sunday morning. We had just finished breakfast and I was cleaning up the kitchen. I happened to look out the window and saw Helga running up the ramp of her deck with her cane. She hurriedly went inside her house. This seemed a little odd to me, because Helga is partially disabled and not able to move that fast. A few minutes later she came back outside and rushed down her ramp as if in some kind of distress. My husband, Mr. Man, and I decided it might be a good idea for him to walk over and see if everything was OK.

The rain was still coming down. By the time Mr. Man got across the street, he saw Helga at KC's gate trying to rescue Ebony the dog. She had been concerned for some time that the animal was being neglected. The dog had been whining and its broken tie out was caught on something. Ebony couldn't get untangled and the doghouse was tipped over on its side. The dog finally broke loose and Helga was actually trying to lift her over the fence, which was an impossible feat. She told Mr. Man that she had already called the P.D. Sure enough, the police cruiser rolled up and he was thinking to himself, "What have I gotten myself into." As Helga's emotions began to get the best of her, Mr. Man took over and was able to fill the officer in on some of the neighborhood issues with KC, the dog's owner. (Remember her? She's also cat hoarder of the century.) The officer offered some suggestions for Helga, but there was nothing they could do at that point, because the animal seemed to be OK. Mr. Man convinced Helga to go with him and got her back to her house. It is interesting to note that KC did not, at any time, come outside to see what was going on and this ole gal doesn't miss a trick!

Just when we were thinking that the rest of the day would be kind of dreary and uneventful, I got a call from M. She had seen Smitty banging on Fancy Nancy's door. He was having an anxiety attack because his vehicle was missing. Nancy finally answered the door and he told her that Jay, his low-life roommate, had taken off in his car the night before and had not returned. He wanted to know if Tommy Boy, Nancy's boy friend, might know where to find Jay. Nancy and Smitty then jumped into her old clunker and rushed off to see if they could find him. Having no luck, they returned to Nancy's house and Smitty ended up walking back home in the rain. Then, some of Jay's friends showed up at his place and told him that Jay had been arrested for driving on a suspended license and Smitty's car had been impounded. Well, he was in a panic because he didn't have any money for the fee to get the car out of impound. Lucky for Smitty, his brother came to the rescue and his car is now back home. There seems to be such on-going drama in Smitty's life. It's not that he goes looking for trouble, but it sure seems to find him no matter where he roams. He just can't stay away from the elements that make up, as Helga puts it, "the underworld."

So, the next time it’s raining outside, I’m sure that old phrase will pop into my head, “Count the Sunny Hours and Forget the Rainy Days.” However, after all that ensued on a particular Sunday in early spring, it will remind me of one “rainy day” I won’t soon forget!